You are receiving an award –- either one that already exists, or a new one created just for you. What would the award be, why are you being honored, and what would you say in your acceptance speech?
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‘Award For Tolerance Of Bullshit’
Education Minister: I’d like to take this opportunity to present you this award for continued support to the soul-crushing education system. You have been tolerating all our mindless rules and oppressive ways that we employ to basically rein in your freedom of thought and action. Not that you had a choice, but we, in our generosity, would like to reward you for this tolerance that you were forced to.
Me (in my rejection speech): (holding the award with tears in my eyes as I text some psychiatrist for an appointment) I am at a loss of words at Mr Minister’s generosity to me. In just a few words, you have taken me back to my childhood, where I learned crap I could never use. But I’d rather not take all the credit. This would have been impossible without your persistent attempts at inventing more and more innovative techniques of torture thay we’d no way out of. So, I’d like to return this PTSD-triggering piece of shit, back to the person who deserves it best.
In response to:
Daily Prompt: I’d Like to Thank My Cats